Tampax has asked me to put a few words together into a write-up re the Kanchanaburi Away Station run.  I'm an Engineer not a scribe so don't expect Shakespearean prose !. 

This was going to be a great day for me as not only was it my first Away Station run of any kind in Thailand it was also only my second run with the Bush Hash. 

The last time I visited Kanchanaburi / Bridge on the River Kwai was the better part of 20 years ago.  The place has changed a lot. Last time I was there all you had was the bridge, a railway line and a small hut for tickets.  True there were some out lying houses but very little compared to what now exists - how time changes things.

I arrived mid morning from BKK to find a lot of Hashers looking the worse for wear. Obviously more than one hasher had had more than a "shed load" the night before. Various comments heard were "I'm going to take it easy on the run" ie my bowels are not to be trusted due to the amount I drunk last night, to my leg / arm / shin / thigh feels "tight" ie you either fell over last night or strained yourself trying to pole dance.  In other words about par for the course on a Hash run !.

It was a great way to start a run - a ride on the famous River Kwai railway.  Still as rickety and noisy as I remember all those years back and the marvelous view hasn't changed a bit, a mixture of flat farm land and mountains. One thing that immediately hit you as we clanked along was the hot air. I'd heard Kanchanaburi was one of the hottest regions in Thailand and this seemed to confirm it.

The train stopped at a small station in the middle of nowhere and we all got off.  No idea where we were or the name of the place but then that all adds to the experience and fun in my opinion. Next we boarded a Bus to the run start points, two in total.  First drop off point was for the "long" run. I was one of the "hardy" (read stupid) few who thought a "long run" was just what was needed on a "warm" day like this !. 

We gathered together for the pre-run briefing which consisted of "don't get lost as we won't bother to look for you" followed by "it starts over there so get going".  I jauntily set off with a smile on my face and a spring in my step as all Hashers do who have no idea as to what they are letting themselves in for. It didn't take more then 15 mins to realise that this was going to be tougher than I had expected due to the extreme heat. 

We progressed over flat tracts of farm land punctuated by various "detours" up and over various mountain ranges - I say mountains, well they weren't exactly out of the Everest mould but all the same in that heat a slight rise in the ground was enough to bring on a profuse comment well known to hashers the world over - "f++k me".  Although the climbing up and over rocks was hard work it was well worth it as the view / scenery was beautiful.

We eventually descended a steep down hill section to break cover from the jungle onto a valley floor.  It was at this point that I would estimate the temperature was around 38 to 40 deg C.  We all spread out to try and solve the check but it was like running in a blast furnace - my ears felt as if someone was holding a hairdryer to them at full heat. I was at one point within 5 meters of solving this one before I turned back thinking it can't be this way only to hear "On On" called two minutes later from exactly the same spot - maybe I need glasses !.  

Luckily we were only a short distance from the water stop which was located in a small cave complete with it's own Buddha.  Boy was it good to be somewhere cool. My past Hashing experience has always been that water stops are just a place to top off and keep going - I was glad to be told that we would wait for everyone to catch up.  In total I guess we spent about 20 mins at the cave drinking water, resting and taking photos.  This it turned out was also the starting point for the runners who chose to do the second half shorter run - at this point I was thinking good choice !.

Once everyone had re-grouped we were off again.  We soon reached another rocky up hill section and at this point I noticed marker ribbons tied in the trees.  Maybe they had been on other parts of the trail but if they were I hadn't noticed. I soon found out that our trail was also the trail used for the adventure races held in this area the week before and these ribbons were their marker system.

This struck me as funny as I have a Hash friend from Taiwan ( Croc Dundee ) who competes in this race every year with his brother. They usually win their senior category and have always described this race as tough. Now I'm thinking to myself I can't wait to tell Croc I have been on his trail - and than it dawns on me as to how tough this will probably be - oh well, if Croc can do it so can I !. 

More rocky down hill and then out onto another flat plain with a check.  This one was a good one and tough to find.  Once it was solved we were off again running along a combination of wide dusty track, some narrow trail besides farm fields and the obligatory up and over sections.  The view was again beautiful with mountains in the background and the slow pace of Thai farm life going on in the valleys. It was at this point of the run that I started to feel as if I was going to "hit the wall".  I think it was a combination of not being used to this level of heat (Taiwan where I lived for 14 years is hot but not like this) and not drinking enough fluids before hand. 

I decided to walk to conserve energy.  I figure I am quite fit so it amazed me to see other Hashers run past me - my hat goes off to them, they paced themselves far better than I did that's for sure !.  I followed the trail for a while and met Cabbage Knievel who was looking for paper.  Other hashers were going straight on whereas Cabbage and I were searching on the face of a rocky slope.  Sure enough we found it and so up we went.  I did my best to keep up but was pretty much spent at this point so took it easy.  Once I reached the top of the rise I could hear traffic on a road not too far off so I picked up the pace a bit.

I soon broke out of the jungle and onto a large road with a Temple not too far off to the left - ah-ha I thought, a good sign.  I managed a bit of a run and entering the Temple grounds was presented with the wonderful sight of several locals selling drinks.  I stopped at the first one and bought a bottle of electrolyte and water, drank both in seconds and then bought more telling myself "you never know how much farther you need to go !". 

Refreshed and ready to tackle trail again I set off only to find I was only 150 meters from the finish !.  Eddie my Boxer saw me and ran out to meet me which was great - my wife said "wow - you look like shit" - thank you dear !.  After a bit of a rest I made my way down to the river where our "boat" (looked more like a house adrift than a boat !) was waiting for us. 

A dip in the river served to clean and refresh - just what I needed. Spent the next few hours or so chatting and then eating as we were leisurely pulled along by small power boat back towards our start point. The circle was held on the boat just as it started to get dark. This was my first circle with the Bush hash and I have to say it was great.  I come from a Hash that never used ice so this is new to me - I thought it would be fun but was I in for a surprise - it's painful !. Finally, the end where the Hash Hymn is sung will stick in my mind for a while - watching Noriega go through his routine cracked me up - haven't laughed that hard in a long time.  A great way to finish off the proceedings.

All in all a brilliant run and great mini adventure - tough as it was I wouldn't have had it any other way.  If you want a Sunday stroll join a Sunday strollers club.  Can't wait for the next one - I hope it's just as tough !.

On On

V.T. (Vaseline Thighs).

I, Squeeze My Tube, Sparky and Tampax came up a day early. This involved a long ride with plenty of beer stops. We then had time to tour the city and get supplies for the run. I believe the lodge was in a very good location. It was right in town and allowed us some sight seeing.

The next day (Friday) Hashers started to arrive and the signups begin. It was a very good turnout. It gave a chance for many people to get out of Bangkok and Pattaya areas. After signups everyone had the rest of the day to relax before the run.

The next morning everyone gathers and we all walk over to the train station. We travel to the first station and get off. There’s a bus waiting for us. The bus drove to the start (A Site). Off we go! It’s a very hot day.

After 10-15 minutes we start up our first hill. It had super sharp rocks to climb on (like razor blades). Of course The Tickler was already a bloody mess before he even got to the first hill.

So up Razor Mountain and back down one or two times. After this we got to run on the level for a while. Then we went up the mountain again. Toward the end of the first part we went up a long flight of steps. When we got to the top of the steps we followed steps down into a cave. It was nice and cool and had a little Spirit House inside. A few of the Thai girls showed their respects there.

Just think how hard it was to carry the water and soft drinks up there. Just before it was time to go out and do the second part The Tickler gets there. He had yet another problem his ankle was badly cut. It took the help of Late Cumming Ball Slapper to stop the bleeding while on trail. Thanks LCBS for the first aid.

We were still missing 100 Dollar Skid Mark. Later she made it but was overcome from the heat. That happened to many Hashers that day. They suffered from the heat or cramps. I had the start of a leg cramp but was able to work it out. What a man! The Tickler! “I’m doing the last part”. Lack of blood and just a short stay at the B Site he continued.

The second part started up a small hill with more sharp rocks. Back down and around some rice patties, through thorny woods and back on wide open (no shade). After several clever checks that took the FRBs well off the true trail I spotted paper off to the right. I was with Cabbage Knievil at this point.

Soon we came to a check. The FRBs never came to the check. Like robots they followed the person in front of them. Cabbage Knievil said he would look up the hill. I was happy about that because I had enough hills. I went straight and didn’t hear Cabbage’s on on call.

After I couldn’t find paper I came back. As I got to the check I heard Ballringer calling on on. His voice kept getting louder. This can’t be right because he should be getting farther away from me. As I went up the hill I found Ballringer laying down but still calling on on. Good on him for that! I don’t think most of the FRBs can even spell on on. I know they can’t call it out.

Up the hill and we’re finally at the finish. After some refreshments we all went back to the river and got on a raft. There we had a good meal, circle and a trip down the river to our lodge. The night continued with plenty of drink. Thanks to the Hares and the Joint GMs for all the hard work they did. The next morning everyone headed out. Many of us decided to do some more sight seeing before going back home. I had a good time and hope the others did also.

On On

G.I.Joe