A-site for Bush Run # CVII
( Click on the map above )

Stats and Trash
Run # CVII 8th August 2009

Total turnout = 51

Photos for Bush Run # CVII
(click on the photo above)





 
 Hash names colour code:
  Men
 Women
 Child
 Number of runs

 
Hares:

Ball Ringer

Bell End

 

 

Faithful Hounds = 23

Returnees = 23

Ringworm (99), GI Joe (68), V.V (64), Arseaholic (60), F***ing Dog (53), Ball Ringer (52), Jellobutt (42), Tadpole (36), The Tickler (36), Queen Stella (33), Squeeze My Tube (26), Rusty Ringhole (25), Tampax (24), Spaghetti Head (22), Mrs Head (20), Rumpleforeskin (15), Late Cumming Ball Slapper (14), Katoey Anal Masturbator (10), Stinky Sloppy Seconds (10), Cabbage Knievel (6), Cabbage Flaps (5), Makin’ Bacon (5), Empty Spermbank (4)



Seaman Stains (75), Pussy Virus (59), Rabid Bitch (45), Bell End (44), Pussy Galore (44), Smiling Brown Spider (35), Hash Hash (32), Hobbit (23), Dizzy (21), Greyhound (18), No More Cum (18), That’s The One (18), Jackal (17), Linguini Weeny (12), Sheik Meme (12), No Trucking Idea (11), Honey Bunny (9), Gary Glitter (8), $100 Skid Mark (7), Hot Mama (4), Just Give Me One (3), Smelly Bastard (3), My Precious (2)

 
Bush Virgins = 5 Sponsors and Donors:

  Dr Goy, Horse, Spielberg, Rick Johnson, Tim Komkuntod

 

 


             Paying Brewmaster: F***ing Dog
            Paying Hares: Ball Ringer and Bell End
            A-site food: Anonymous Hasher !
            Case of Tiger beer: Tampax

 
Anniversaries: Names:
Sextuple Bushmaster status:  
Quintuple Bushmaster status:  
  Quadruple Bushmaster status: Ball Ringer
  Tripple Bushmaster status:  
  Double Bushmaster status: Squeeze My Tube
  Single Bushmaster status:  
Birthdays:  



Sirijan Vilaiwan named: Just Give Me One

 I_AM_EUROPEAN_55YO_CONSIDERED_GOOD_LOOKING 
_ LIVING_PERMANENT_IN_THAILAND
Run Story By:
$100 Skid Mark

PATTAYA BUSH HASH TRASH
RUN # CVII
AUGUST 8th, 2009

HARES: Ball Ringer and Bell End

Hey all! $100 SKID MARK here. Slender (despite what you say, RABID BITCH!) sensual 33YO non-smoker farang woman, keen on cleaning & cooking, workable English, eager & ready to love and tend to a European widower or divorcee for long term relationship. I'd greet you upon landing at Bangkok Suvarnabhumi terminal. Dare call me at : +66 8507X1783 and yes, am just a wee bit obsessed with the Lonely Hearts ads in Pattaya Trader. I give all credit for introducing me to this charming periodical to SHEIK MEME, who was checking out the real estate section  (or so he says . . .) I laughed my ass off, and now I can’t stop looking up the PT personal ads on the internet (hey, it beats working).

Anyhoo, no gimmicks or chick lit or letters to the Sierra Club, this one is just a straight up run report in the old school tradition, immortalizing the memorable moments of run #CVII and glorifying hares BELL END and BALL RINGER 5"10.. slim !!! short grey haired guy 40yrs young in both mind and dress!! looking for a soul mate relationship with slim actractive girl 20-22 yrs must be well educated and speak good english (no bar girls please)please write to me with pics to..easyriderX66@hotmail.com. Seriously, girls, with an email addy like that, this he’s got to be a winner! I’m writing today!

In addition to other virtues, this was a fantastic run for wildlife spotting. Props go to LATE COMING BALL SLAPPER and CANADIAN BACON 29YO Canadian lady but looks Thai from a distance, no kid,never married. Looking for a nice man 85+ yo with terminal cancer and mammoth offshore bank account for serious relationship. Let me be the one to love you for the last time. These sharp-eyed ladies initially reported that they’d spotted an elusive “Thai Beaver,” though they later admitted “it might have been a squirrel.” Flies, midges and killer bees were also out in abundance, the latter punishing RABID BITCH and GI JOE for pissing on their nest.

Perhaps my fav hash moment came when PUSSY VIRUS was slogging through the mud when suddenly SHEIK MEME Hi! I'am a goodlooking AUSSIE guy, 39 year old, slim build and goodlooking. I have [an uncurable sexually transmitted disease] I'm looking for a nice thai girl that [has same disease] and wants to share here life with a sweet partner (marriage). I have a very [?] As I was saying, SMM leaped on PV’s back as if to ride him to the other side, but instead knocked him into the sludge where PV impaled his palm on a sharp stake. (Believe it or not, when I saw SMM the next day, he was still puzzling over why PV was being so uptight about the whole thing. It was only a little prick, after all).

The run concluded with a race between JELLO BUTT and SMELLY BASTARD for the coveted First Place at the August Bush Hash! Such an important honor that nobody remembers who actually won, though it was widely speculated that such race-ist antics usually indicate a baby-Gherkin sized penis. Thanks to RUSTY RING HOLE for being the first (but not the last) to point this out, probably because he lost to both these fine Olympians and is also EUROPEAN 35YO CONSIDERED GOOD LOOKING LIVING PERMANENT IN THAILAND (MOSTLY IN THE MAGIC TABLE BAR) SPEAK THAI ENOUGH IF YOU WANT KNOW MORE ABOUT ME KNOCCHING [?] IN MY E-MAIL AND I LOOKING FOR A SERIOUS GIRL 22-26 YO SORRY NO BAR GIRL.

The circle was a rousing good time, with PUSSY VIRUS, RUSTY RING HOLE and HASH HASH taking turns dealing out punishment. One whose deeds went unpunished was LATE COMING BALL SLAPPER who pissed off early with THE TICKLER, claiming she had a physical in the morning and wished to show up with at least half her pancreas intact. Meh. The things people worry about. HASH HASH iced RABID BITCH for getting “f-ed in the a at McDonalds,” a disjointed retelling that (like most things HASH HASH says) left us scratching our heads. JUST GIVE ME ONE, a Slim and lovely 22YO non-drinker, non-smoker Thai lady, looking for a steady relationship with a Norseman willing to consider residing in Thailand. Thai Air having initiated nonstop services Oslo to Bangkok, it's easy for you to get to me. Call +66 8X14317X5, joined the pantheon of Pattaya hashers after begging a little too hard for a name. GI JOE took a turn to plug his new star vehicle, Rise Of The Cobra, and assured us Cobra will both have a hood in the film and will spit.

Other random quotage from the circle:

  • “For twenty-four hours after you eat at McDonalds, you can’t trust a fart.” – HASH HASH

  • “Is that a f*cking cigar? It looks like a submarine!” – PUSSY VIRUS on the thing smoking in HASH HASH’S face

  • “Have you ever seen a cigar in a pig’s ass?” – also PUSSY VIRUS, see above

  • “She is Thai! I lived in America seven years with the military. She is Thai, I tell you!” – UNKNOWN HASHER    talking about CANADIAN BACON, who is neither Thai nor American

  • “As I said to my ex-wife when I left America, ‘I’m just going out for a beer!’” – JELLO BUTT

  • “This is weird. The ice is kinda warm.” – RABID BITCH

  • “A hasher gives birth!” – UNKNOWN, but very funny, as when the guys stood up, there was a cute little froggy   on the ice.

So again, a fantastic time had by all and props to the hares and beer truck and RAs and all you fine people for another fantastic weekend! Off now to answer an ad from Seamus who is 31 years old and am from England. I now live and work in Jomtien. I am looking to meet a nice kind hearted and loyal caring lady. I am looking for a genuine lady that is looking for a relationship. Please write to me and send pictures to zaxmo197X@hotmail.com. P. S. BAR GIRLZ RULE!!!!!

All Lonely Hearts ads were basically real, but twisted edited to protect the innocent and the guilty. Yes, even the incurable disease one. The only one that’s completely fake is CANADIAN BACON. Only because I know she’s dreamin’, wishin’, hopin’ and prayin’ for a guy like that =).

On-on,

$100 Skid Mark

P.S.: I hope no one reading this recognizes their own ad that they placed themselves. Sheesh. That would be embarrassing.

P. P. S: Email me if you can tell me the name of the Thai band/song where the girl’s upset over a break-up, so she sets her pet rabbit on fire and it turns into a steak. I must, must, must, must acquire a copy of that somehow to show the folks at home. Oh, and at the end, she sets the new girlfriend on fire. You just can’t show that s*it anymore in America anymore unless it’s R-rated.

P. P. S. Really, does anyone else think the Lonely Hearts are being a little tough on the bar girls? What if all the girls in Pattaya decided to limit themselves to guys who stayed home Friday nights and read Russian literature? We’d see droves of frustrated, middle-aged men flying away to greener pastures (I hear Moldova’s up and coming . . .)

P. P. P. S. OK, I’m really leaving now! Seamus is coming ‘round at 8 to pick me up for a hot date =)


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