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Report
Run 90 # XC
Hares:
Rabid Bitch and Jellobutt
Total Turnout = 53
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| Faithful Hounds = 24 |
Returners = 16 |
Ringworm (84), GI Joe (52), Seaman Swallow (51), V.V (51), Festering Streaker (50), Pussy Virus (49), Arseaholic (46), Ball Ringer (38), Rabid Bitch (38), Bell End (37), Jellobutt (31), The Tickler (21), Tinkerbell (19), Timmy Tightpants (18), Dizzy (17), Mr Statler (17), Roger the Sick Prick (16), Hobbit (14), Spaghetti Head (10), Squeeze My Tube (10), Garbage Collector (7), Rumpleforeskin (7), Daisy (4), Sweet Pussy (4)
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Big Nosed Bastard (68), Knickerless (55), Are You Sure (24), Naughty Nat (21), Queen Stella (20), Pig Pusher Swine Stabber (12), Tampax (11), Chucky (8), Mrs Head (8), Gary Glitter (5), I’m Not Sure (5), Missing Link (5), Dunkin’ Donuts (4), Rear Gunner (3), Little Big Balls (2), Satan’s Willy (2)
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| Bush Virgins = 13 |
Sponsors and Donors: |
Caligula, Doctor Evil, Dribble Dick 2, Emma Royde, Fuzzy Lure, Haggis, Irish Spew, Kiwi Sausage, Pam, Priscilla, Quickie, Running Dick, Small Bone
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Food: Provided by the hares
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Anniversaries: |
Names: |
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Run Story By:
Spaghetti Head
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Bush Run XC (90)
Two weeks ago, I asked Jellobutt to scribe for the PH3 telling him that I would reciprocate, as the scribe, on the next BH3 that I attended. Well, guess what? it’s payback time for old Spag now! Today’s A-site was a short ride for us who do not live in the Bangkok area or in the confines of “Sin City”.In fact, it is very close to a recent BH3 A-site which caused Mrs. Head and me to purchase land to get further away from Pattaya. The hard noontime rain was a welcomed relief for the dry conditions we have recently experienced. Yes, it would require additional work for today’s hares; Jellobutt and Rabid Bitch but, sc--w them!
The A-site was well shaded and provided ample parking space for those who arrived early. Those who arrived late, including “Hobbit”, proceeded to spin their tires and coat everything, including Spag Head, in mud! After the usual run markings were explained, the pack was off and running!
Pussy Virus was leading the way, with machete in hand to cut the trail. The normal FRB’s, G.I. Joe, Roger TSP, Knickerless, Queen Stella, etc., were closely behind Pussy Virus. The trail started off well marked and flat but, knowing the area and Jellobutt, it would quickly change! Which it did! Numerous checks kept the pack together until the gently undulating hills (or do we call them mountains) started. The trail was easy to follow due to the echoes of On-On being loudly called by front running G.I. Joe and Mrs. Head. Additionally, many foot prints were implanted in the freshmud, to follow, if the paper was missing!
Numerous runners were involved in slips, falls, and total hash crashes. Daisy was awarded the most points for her many take offs, aerial twists, and crash landings observed during her climb and descent on one steep hill alone. After approximately 2 hours, the first true walkers and runners started to arrive back, at the A-site with Missing Link and Satins Willy leading the way! Of course, the SCB’s, Festering Streaker, Dizzy, and Spag. Head, were already into the cold beers! At 2:10 after the run began, Pussy Virus still carrying his machete led the dirty, sweaty pack in.
All runners were back within 2:30 which is very unusual as Arse-a-holic normally takes a nap during long runs that Jellobutt hares. Prior to the start of the circle, a great social hour was “topped off” with succulent food prepared by Nantha45 and her friend Nan. Special thanks go to the hares and their able assistants for their hard work, technical planning, and “can do” attitude!
The circle started with the Joint Master, Seamen Swallow, icing Jellobutt and Rabid Bitch! The group voted unanimously that the run was a success! The ringing of a phone quickly got Little Big Balls iced so he could receive the wrath of the JM for disturbing her circle. Ringworm was given the circle and promptly iced VV, Mr. Waldorf, and Garbageman for being French and he explained why his grandfather did not require a passport to enter France in the 1940’s. Continuing, Pig Pusher Swine Stabber was accused of going over the “pig pen fence” for a possible short time! Running Dick, the animal expert, acted as a lawyer in PPSS’s defense only because he knows the difference between “real pigs” and wives (“true dears”)! Knickerless iced, the first of her many times, for “complaining about having no maid or gardener provided for her” in Singapore! BNB iced, for running circles on the “helo pad” at work!
Tampax iced, for providing lights for the circle the same as the lights for tonight’s Motor GP. Gary Glitter, Are-u-sure, Hobbit, and Spag. Head iced, for parking and mud slinging offenses! Jellobutt and Knickerless iced,because of a “man overboard” exercise conducted during the DNTKLC return boat trip! The rescue effort caused additional undue havoc during the evenings festivities! Including the providing of room accommodations with breakfast!
Dizzy iced Ball Ringer and Bell End for swapping caps, which equates to a “cross dressing” violation! Do they swap other items of clothing on a regular basis? Quickie and Knickerless iced, for nursing/medical assistance provided to an injured golfer! Little Big Balls and Sweet Pussy iced, for a newly painted vehicle being scratched with a “penis ring”! Aussie’s iced, for “slave driving” their Korean workers! Dates in History: BNB, Knickerless, Ballringer, Running Dick, Rumpled Foreskin iced, in a replay of “Mash”!
Rabid Bitch, Little Big Balls, Ringworm, Gary Glitter iced for their roles in “Animal House”! Festering Streaker, Gary Glitter, Pussy Virus iced, for providing mosquito repellant cigar smoke during tonight’s circle. BNB called
all of the ladies in for “International Women’s Day”! Dizzy provided the Aussie “Dunny Song” with the
smokers on the ice.
At this point, in the evening, things began to get a little foggy and/or maybe it wasgetting a little smoky! No! It was getting a little drunk, believe me! I was finally saved by the “Hash Hymn”being conducted tonight by Ringworm! The “Hash Hymn”, conducted mostly in the “silent mode” did not make my head hurt! But, the final chorus, conducted in Reggae, made it hurt like hell! What a noisy ending to a really nice day! Only kidding Max! Good Job – Hares and Hashers! Drive safe! See everyone again next run!
Spaghetti Head
The Pattaya Bush Hash would like to thank Kiwi Sausage and his group from Hong Kong and our other visitors for joining us all on Saturday and wish Kiwi Sausage the best of luck and hope his Stag night in Pattaya went well.
On ON PBH3
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