The Monkeys go to Korat

Monkey hash run XIX, an outstation run.

A Penny Drops production, assisted by Bam-Bam, with a cast of over 30 monkeys.

Off and away from Pattaya at 8:30 in a pair of mini-buses, whose drivers were only programmed to do trips to the airport and almost got there, before their controller set them right. Got to Penny Drops’ house after a 4 hour trip, to be joined by the local hashers and some strays, where a most welcome meal was enjoyed by all.

A short ride or warm up jog to the A site for a quick circle to introduce the virgin monkeys: Undomefly and Colin from Korat, Peter from Bangkok, BB from Laos and Try a Fuck. Then told by hare Bam-Bam to face a large pond, which was to be our first obstacle and the alternatives were a jungle style bamboo and rope bridge or a parallel rope trick, which two monkeys braved.

Then the serious on-on began, plenty of long checks, to keep us all together and tire the FRBs. When we were well into our pace a devious loop, which some of the fitter monkeys claimed to have gone around two or three times. The wiser monkeys who walked got them out of their misery and back on trail. Some nice long, wooded and undulating tracks led to the water stop at a look out point with scenic views across the hills and forests. The entertainment in the second part was provided by a mountain stream which progressively got deeper at each encounter, a very clever check-back, where we could see and hear a heavy rain storm approaching, allowing us to run away from it and even a field of cassava for nostalgia.

A short circle to ice the hares was conducted by JGM Sheik Meme. The consensus of opinion was that it was a very good hash course and enjoyed by all, even the three monkeys, who got a little lost.

The food laid on by Penny Drops was excellent fare, with spare ribs, pasta dishes, chilly beans and rice. Then back to the garden for the main circle, which began with 12 run monkey awards for Jell-O Butt and myself; Diaper Dan for the hash was Undomefly. Rectom was given a special monkey hash name of George’s Bitch, for his antics on a previous visit to Korat; the gardener was named Machete Man, for his assistance in clearing parts of the trail. Ring masters included JGMs Bam-bam and Sheik Meme, Spag head, Wobbly boots, Undomefly, Dizzy, BB and RSB, who all provided good entertainment.

Losers:

Penny Drops – a plate of home cured ham.

Ball ringer – a pair of specks and shoes.

RSB – a pair of socks.

Spag head, Ball ringer and Tyr a Fuck. – the trail

Coach driver – a front wing.

Monkeys – who didn’t get a slice of ham.

Smelly Bastard. – the water wagon to touch at the finish.

Winners:

All the monkeys who attended.

On-on Greyhound.

Testimonial:

Penny Drops,

  Sir Spaghetti Head here (Sir – only because of having 500 plus runs with the Pattaya H3)! I just wanted to take a little of your time to let you know all of the Monkey Hashers arrived back in Pattaya safely around the 2:30 timeframe. Of course, we continued at the Thistle Bar until late into the night!

  On behalf of all Monkey Hashers who attended this weekends festivities, I would like to say a “sincere thank you” to you, your family, employee’s, and local community friends who allowed this great weekend to take place. The tremendous effort put forth was simply amazing! It was an outstanding effort by everyone who had anything to do with making it happen and/or causing it to run without a single hitch or glitch!

  The first part of the trail reminded me of running “ultra’s” back in the U.S. many years ago! The beautiful mountain scenery, cool shady areas, and groomed trails were a pleasure to run on and enjoy! The effort to find them and join them together is truly a dedication to “hard work and perfection”! It reflects upon what I was taught many years ago – “never settle for anything but the best”! It was truly the “best Monkey Run, and superior to many many other Hash runs” that I have done over the years. Everyone’s efforts were greatly appreciated!

  Now to the food and accommodations: The chef must be commended for his “5 star” efforts! Food fit for a “king” and enough for an army! Wow! I’ve gained 3-5 pounds just thinking about it again! The job of finding accommodations for 30 plus individual’s (without extensive transportation requirements) was amazing if not magical! Communication, coordination, and the dedication to “make it happen” – “made it happen”!

  It was my since pleasure to assist you (what little I did) with the great breakfast which you provided on Sunday morning! Once again – “5 star and enough for an army”! Everyone departed with a full stomach and a happy smile on their face! Most slept on the way back to Pattaya – the others, just continued “down – downing” the beers!

  Please past our “highest praise and sincere thank you” to everyone, once again!

Spaghetti Head (Jim Emmert)